Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
