she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize