return my video game
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
