4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
