Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize