pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
