At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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