brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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