The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
In the future we'll all be gay
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
