Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Is it penis luge time yet?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
