She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
