She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
well you can't waste a boner
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
