NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
