so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Randomize
