I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i was born a porn star she said
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I just gargled with NyQuil
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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