3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
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