But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I think my fart just growled at me.
honey bunches of taint.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
