I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
