Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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