New invention idea: vibrating tampons
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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