I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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