By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Im part way to drunk.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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