So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
