porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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