My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Randomize
