It's Friday. Sex?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
