Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
