the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize
