I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
