exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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