it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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