Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
