i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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