She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
