you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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