I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize
