it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
