is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
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