If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
