yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
