We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
