chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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