operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
