Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
