And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
