Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
