she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
