I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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