I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Randomize
