Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
